Let the blogging commence...

I don't know how to live without him. I know we still have "us" but we're not US anymore. I don't know what to do. It's all too new. Too fresh. It doesn't seem real to me. Like I woke up thinking it was a bad dream...hoping it was a bad dream. And it's not. This is the reality we live in. But we're both strong. We still love each other, but now on a different level. A stronger level, but a different one all together.

It's really weird not IM'ing just random things. It's hard not acting like the us we were yesterday. It's hard not acting like I know how to act. It's this whole new thing I am so unsure of. And I know I can't or shouldn't but I keep wondering if this is right. We were supposed to make it! We were supposed to have our happy ever after! And yes, maybe we still will. It's just all so fresh and new. I don't think it will get to the point of acceptance for a long time...

I just want to run up to him and hug him and have him kiss my forehead and tell me everything will be OK. And by OK I mean that we as in US will be ok. Not that we're going to be ok in the sense of both he and I...OOF. OOF I SAY.