Random thoughts, ahoy!
Life is scary right now. Fuck scary. It is absolutely frightening. Why? Why you may ask? Because my mind is going in freaking overdrive. I feel like I am failing at this grand, old thing called life. And I don't know why. I have a great life. A great house. A great everything. But I feel like such a freaking failure.
Do you ever have those moments where all of a sudden you are just MOTIVATED!?!? Like WHAM! I am gonna stick to this diet and workout plan! I am gonna go back to school in the fall! I am gonna speak my mind more and not be scared to be myself! Hehe, too bad those feelings are short-lived and rarely last past day 2...LOL.
Did you ever wonder what if you didn't do that one thing, where your life would be? Like I wonder what if I Ryan would have asked me out before Mark (waaaaayyyy back in high school). Where would life have taken me? Or what if I HAD gone right into Spanish my freshman year of college(like I should have). Where would I be today?
I wish I could see me the way other people see me. Like when someone says "you're beautiful," don't you ever wonder what that means? Do I have a glow? Is it like Shallow Hal where even if you're chubby or ugly, if you have a good heart and soul, people see you as this gorgeous creature?
Pauley Shore...Pauley Shore was on TMZ! I love that guy! So glad he still seems all Pauley-rific!
Am I as bad a person as I think I am? Or is that just me being too hard on myself?
Folgers commercials always get me. I mean, the Christmas one where the brother who's in the army comes home and the little sister is all geeked makes me smile. The one where the daughter comes down her dad is giving her "guff" until she shows him her engagement ring gets me even more. One day that will be me...One day....
It scares me that I'm scared to talk to my friends.
It's so strange how text code has made itself comfy into everyday life. Like even when verbally speaking somone, I tend to throw in "BRB" or I "LOL'd for real" or something else. How weird is that? I mean it takes just about the same time to say "be right back" or "I laughed out loud for real". Ya know?
Man...Brain's in overdrive. Can ya tell?
Do you ever have those moments where all of a sudden you are just MOTIVATED!?!? Like WHAM! I am gonna stick to this diet and workout plan! I am gonna go back to school in the fall! I am gonna speak my mind more and not be scared to be myself! Hehe, too bad those feelings are short-lived and rarely last past day 2...LOL.
Did you ever wonder what if you didn't do that one thing, where your life would be? Like I wonder what if I Ryan would have asked me out before Mark (waaaaayyyy back in high school). Where would life have taken me? Or what if I HAD gone right into Spanish my freshman year of college(like I should have). Where would I be today?
I wish I could see me the way other people see me. Like when someone says "you're beautiful," don't you ever wonder what that means? Do I have a glow? Is it like Shallow Hal where even if you're chubby or ugly, if you have a good heart and soul, people see you as this gorgeous creature?
Pauley Shore...Pauley Shore was on TMZ! I love that guy! So glad he still seems all Pauley-rific!
Am I as bad a person as I think I am? Or is that just me being too hard on myself?
Folgers commercials always get me. I mean, the Christmas one where the brother who's in the army comes home and the little sister is all geeked makes me smile. The one where the daughter comes down her dad is giving her "guff" until she shows him her engagement ring gets me even more. One day that will be me...One day....
It scares me that I'm scared to talk to my friends.
It's so strange how text code has made itself comfy into everyday life. Like even when verbally speaking somone, I tend to throw in "BRB" or I "LOL'd for real" or something else. How weird is that? I mean it takes just about the same time to say "be right back" or "I laughed out loud for real". Ya know?
Man...Brain's in overdrive. Can ya tell?
posted by Ill-Fated Butterfly at 7:44 PM
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