This just flat out sucks

So this is life. So this is life? What the hell!? I am so sick of this! Why can't things ever go right? Why must everything be one huge mess? When you try to do the "right" thing, you end up getting royally screwed in the end. So does that mean (therefore, ergo) that you should do the wrong thing and everything will work itself out? From the hell I have been through this past year, it seems that by stepping up to the plate, telling the truth and attempting to reconcile I did nothing more but screw myself over. We all learn from our mistakes, and it seems like the main lesson that is supposed to be learned here is that by doing the right thing and admitting when you are at fault for something makes you a f*ckin moron.
I don't know, I just don't know anymore, and I am sick of this. I wish I didn't have to wake up to this pain everyday. I wish I didn't have to live in a world that spits on you for trying to be the "better" person. It hurts to say this, but kills even more to know and understand this...I am nothing more than anything...nothing more than nothing...and I am the ill-fated butterfly, who will never be free.