Quick blurb--stupid holidays

Have you ever wanted something so bad, but when you get it, you don't really want it anymore? Why is that? You strive so hard to attain that thing you feel will complete you or make you happy...But it has an adverse affect...And it does just the opposite. Is it because it's not exactly what you wanted in your mind? Is it because you feel there is something wrong, something missing? Is it because it's not what you had pre-planned? So many questions without any answers.

I guess I'm feeling kinda shady because of the holidays. Once upon a time I LOVED them, I couldn't wait for them to arrive. Now, I just wish they'd pass me by. Yes, it's fun to decorate and buy stuff for people and see the lights and listen to Christmas songs, but it's not the same anymore. The winds of change blew that flame out, and I am left with a hand burned from melted wax, and no light to lead me.