Stupid Me Saturday

I have to admit this, I am absolutely embarrassed by how I conducted myself this weekend. And though I was told to not worry about it, that it's in the past, I need to say how utterly sorry I am for acting the way I did.

Drinking is a fun thing to do at times. Drinking in hella-excess is not. A fine line divides "Fun" Me from "Out of Control" Me, and I am sad, ashamed, and upset to have to admit it, but I skated it for a while, then totally crossed it.

I've sworn off getting as stupid-drunk as I was on Saturday EVER again. (And yes, I've made that a true promise). And not because I was hungover to the point of not leaving the bedroom yesterday, but because I know that the me that was seen wasn't the real me. It was almost like a possession or embodiment of some evil twin who was just insane. The real reason that I am swearing it off is because I made the person I care most about upset, embarrassed and angry. And I refuse to ever do that to him again.

Wow, I feel like this confession stamps me with a big, old "alcoholic" label. But it shouldn't. We all have our fun times, our crazy and our stupid, and I must admit that this was the dumbest I have been in a while. And the dumbest I intend to get EVER again.

So there you have it. Drinking can be a fun time, but if it means I may potentially hurt the person I love the most, then I really don't want any part of it.