For the sake of happiness...

It's really weird. It's really weird how all of a sudden, there's a bank-turn that you know you can't control. You have to make a decision as to what to do...and you do it. You end up having a massive rollover...and you're left to think...what the hell happened?

Life has been so strange for me lately. I never in a million years believed things would be moving forward like they are. It was really hard doing what I had to do. So hard, I can't even begin to put words to it. But it goes to show just what you'll do for someone you love, what lengths you will go through to make sure they can live a happy life...even though it breaks your heart and soul into jagged pieces that cut you every time you think about them.

The memories are the worst of it. It's hard letting go of something that shouldn't be let go. But I have to...for the sake of their present and future happiness, I begrudgingly have to. I want to be mad. I want to hold a grudge. I want to harbor resentment, but I can't. It meant too much to me to do any of those things.

I always thought we'd look back on our tears and laugh...I never thought we'd look back on our laughter and cry.

And just when things couldn't get crazier...

I recently found out some extremely awful news regarding a "friend." I don't know what else to say except that I truly hope he's ok and doesn't do anything to hurt himself. Life is crazy. Shit happens. We all do dumb things, but I really, really, REALLY hope he's going to be ok. His life took an INSANE turn for the worse, where he got hit from all sides...It's just scary. I can't (and don't want to) imagine what he must be going through. The thoughts that would be going through his head...*shudder* Prayers and positive vibes are being focused in his direction, wherever he may be.